If someone were to ask me what I want to be when i grow up, my answer would be "girly."
Lately, I've been in rare form. I look at myself, and literally cringe. I hate hate hate my appearance. And my sad look is not for lack of trying, I assure you. I try and do my hair and make up, but all it does is make me see my greys, or my huge pores. I try and dress myself nicely with what i do have, but i haven't gotten a good deal of clothes to fit my new body since long before i had Luke.
I need to learn to love what I am right now. That's what i tell myself. But at this point I'm wondering HOW. I used to not be so embarrassed to nurse in front of Peter, but now i find myself blushing if he gets a peak at my post baby belly.
I remember the days where my skin was great, my teeth were white, my hair was always done and cute, my make up was subtle but pretty, and my clothes were awesome. I'm not expecting the body of an 18 year old again, but I would like something to be happy about. I'm only 24, and I feel and look so much older. I used to wear jewelry, and perfume everyday. I want to be more feminine and girly before my daughter realizes i'm not.
A lot of this has to do with self control too. I NEED it so bad. I need to eat better. I need to exercise. I need to pamper myself in any way I can.
I think i'm going to start with a small goal. No. More. Soda. That's easy right? I can do this. Maybe next week I'll have a different goal.
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I think no more soda is a perfect goal!!! Know it won't be like this forever, find moments to pamper when you can and know there will be more moments, more often soon. You should see my sexy-time feet.
ReplyDeleteI've never been the girly type but I can definitely sympathize. It's so hard to find time for ourselves isn't it? I knew it was bad when Faith would ask, "Where are we going?" if I got dressed. That's when I set a goal..be dressed by 9am every morning. It seems silly but it's helped.
ReplyDeleteI also do little things..like the other day I bought some nice hair conditioner & a new brush.
No soda is a great goal!! I think I'm gonna try & stop drinking so much tea. I neeeeeeeed coffee though.
Girl is, of course, a state of mind. And you are very feminine. You are the doing the most feminine thing possible when you breastfeed your baby. The hair and the makeup don't make a woman feminine, embracing everything that God gave you as a woman makes you feminine. You embrace your femininity more than just about anyone I know, and that makes you one of the most feminine and beautiful women I know.
ReplyDeleteGo easy on yourself. You just had a baby! And you have two little ones demanding all of your time and attention right now. You have the right idea in starting with baby steps. Just do ONE thing that will make you feel better. Once you have that accomplished, move on to ONE more thing.
I wear perfume every single day. So even if my hair looks terrible and I didn't have time to do my makeup, I still feel pretty. It can be something very small that changes your whole attitude.
Anyway, you are one of the most beautiful women I know--inside and outside. Love yourself like I love you and you'll have it made. XXXOOO
Hon, you are beautiful! And you just had a baby. You need to give yourself some slack. Quitting soda is a great step.
ReplyDeleteSomething I have been doing lately to make me feel more girly is wearing some lip gloss and mascara. Even if I'm going to be staying home all day. I feel a lot better about myself if I do that. :)